a long time ago i went to your house and had a conversation with your mom for the first time. my korean's not perfect but for someone who wasn't born there it's better than not knowing any.
the tense i used to describe something was grammatically incorrect, but your mom felt the need to correct me mid sentence.
i will never forget the way she said those words, the expression on her face, and how she waited for me to realize the mistake i made.
i went back home that night with a lot on my mind.
your mom made me feel like a piece of shit.
it was hard for me to figure out if i had done something wrong, if what i had said was so offensive,
questioning if i should've said that i was sorry for not knowing better.
but it was your mom that was wrong.
and my mom was pissed.
ever since that day i've always been hesitant to speak in korean to those whom it's their first language.
in fear that i would offend them,
that i would say something wrong
like your mom made me feel that night.
and i was reminded of that night last weekend
out with friends whose first language was korean
i ended up admitting why i was so shy
i'd created language barriers with them that i never had to to begin with.
every experience is about what you take away from it.
and with the encouragement of others, in that moment i decided that i'm not gonna let that get to me anymore.
i'd rather make the mistakes, and have friends help me, embrace me, better me.
i'm just embarrassed that i let that get to me for so long.
i feel sorry for the girl that has to deal with a mother in law like that.
i hope that i never have to.
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